Talking about sex openly and candidly can be problematic for many people. Even though you have a satisfying sex life with your mate, you may have a particular fantasy that you would like to share with him, but feel embarrassed to talk about it. Below are some guidelines to help you overcome this fear.


Step 1:

Decide that your fantasy is nothing abnormal. Visit a bookstore and take a look at the number and variety of books in the section on “sexuality” that deal with fantasies written by men and women.

Step 2:
Accept your fantasy as something that, for whatever reason, comes from within you and is nothing to be ashamed of. When you accept yourself by accepting your fantasy, you will be ready to share it with your mate.
Step 3:
Set the mood, much as you would for any sexual encounter. Do what comes natural to you and your mate when leading up to sexual play, and then choose a proper moment in which to share your idea.
Step 4:
Share your fantasy with your mate before or during foreplay. You may just find that the addition of what you’ve had in your imagination all this time will really add a fire to your lovemaking routine.
Step 5:
Be accepting of the fact that your fantasy, as stated, may not turn on your mate in the way you had hoped; be ready to modify some of the elements as she tells you what she would like to do as well. Such suggestions may make the experience richer and more satisfying than you could ever have imagined.

Tips & Warnings

  • Remember that virutally everyone has sexual fantasies of some type. We are all sexual beings at our essence, so it is very normal to think about sex in a variety of ways. Be open with your mate, and you will create a stronger, more realistic approach to your relationship.
  • Sharing a sexual fantasy puts you in an extremely vulnerable position. Be sure that you only do so with a partner you can trust completely, and be ready to withstand a possible rejection of the idea, by realizing that it isn’t a rejection of you or your love.